Tuesday, March 26, 2013

Children Are Creepy

This is so profoundly disturbing, I felt the need to share it with all of you.  (Please know: These are real drawings, drawn by a real child.)

Tuesday, March 19, 2013

The Benefits Of Being Ugly

Society definitely has its long-standing and well-entrenched standards of what being attractive means.  Despite some characteristics that garner our focus shifting from decade to decade, there are some that have always been pervasive and will continue to be well into the future.  Things like above-average height, signs of fertility, well-defined musculature and even a palpable aura of happiness have always been key factors in attracting the largest number of possible mates.  The benefits of possessing such qualities or features are obvious and undeniable.  However, for those of you out there that were dealt a raw hand and cannot claim any of these advantages, there is no need to worry.  The Alpha Betas might have popularity on lock in youth, but the nerds always triumph in the end.  Just ask Bill Gates.  So, I'll be highlighting a few reasons you should thank the universe for your ugly self.

Tuesday, March 5, 2013

10 Reasons To Move To Portland (If You're Weird)

I'm moving to Portland!  Well, not really...but I probably should.  Long before the debut of the hilarious Portlandia, I had learned of the magical safe haven for weirdos from all walks of life.  For many, the idea of such a place holds a significant appeal.  Living in Miami, yes, the people are inordinately sexy.  But to have sex with these people you have to toe the line.  You are not free to stray and be yourself, unless being yourself means being like everyone else.  Granted, you're bound to find someone delicious who finds your natural weirdness ironically cool.  Trust me, I live for those moments.  Despite that, I find myself yearning for a place that encourages originality and embraces eccentricity.  This is where Portland comes in.